One year later, I color in my emotion square for the morning. I am feeling anxious today.
One year later, I feel anxiety, but work through it.
One year later, I know that I need to do the work everyday in order to be happy.
One year later, I still have moments where I lapse into my own thoughts.
One year later, I have to schedule in mindfulness to my daily routine; like others might schedule physical exercise.
One year later, I make a choice each day to be alive. Not just alive, but living.
One year ago, I walked through the doors to my future.
One year ago today, I didn't think I wanted to be here anymore. The only emotion I knew was hopeless.
One year ago today, I was scared. I didn't know if I had it in me to get better.
One year ago today, I thought I needed to be fixed.
Today, I still struggle.
Today, I know that I don't need fixed.
Today, I know that I want to be here.
Today, I am living.
"Today, I still struggle.
ReplyDeleteToday, I know that I don't need fixed.
Today, I know that I want to be here.
Today, I am living."
And knowing that, is more than half the battle. Bravo for hanging in there and doing the work it took to get here.
Thank you! It isn't always easy, but it is worth it.
DeleteBeautifully honest and powerful. Thank you for sharing this!
ReplyDeleteBeing mindful is SOOO powerful and I am glad it has you in it's clutches. Thank you for being raw with honesty, and seizing the opportunities as they come.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I told my son this morning that being mindful is so difficult, but very worthwhile.
DeleteBeautiful post! Scheduling mindful reflection is important for me too. I have started using my daily walking time to do this. Instead of listening to music or a podcast I just walk and think. I really like the list structure of your post. It almost reads like poetry!
ReplyDeleteThank you! This isn't my typical writing style, but I enjoyed writing my story in this way.
DeleteI am glad you are here and that you shared your story. Your repetition was powerful in this piece. I could feel the tension and the weight of the work you are doing to fully live as you want and need to live.
ReplyDeleteIt's good to know today, and be in--today. Lovely reflections and listings. Lists are good.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations, you have made it one year later out of something really difficult. You are and will be stronger for it. You write beautifully and honestly about healing.
ReplyDeleteThank you for trusting us with your story. Your line "Not just alive, but living." is a powerful distinction.
ReplyDelete